5 Reasons I Didn't Like The Siren
Since my last review was negative, and this review is going to be even more negative (and also to keep myself from rambling), I'm going to organize my dislike in 5 reasons.
But first, what's the book about?
The book follows a siren (mermaid) named Kahlen who is all doom and gloom until she meets a boy. And that's it. THAT'S. IT.
Are you relishing in the disappointment? Yeh, me too.
Reason #1: Dry, dull, cardboard cutout, paper, leaf-blowing-in-the-wind characters.
I'll be real. I'm easily bored, so maybe it's just me. But no, this was stupid, and so were the characters. I'd watch my milk curdle rather than suffer through these characters again. And I'm lactose intolerant.
Reason #2: A boring ass plot, riddled with boring ass "twists".
I mean, the girl kills people for a living with her singing voice, and I didn't care. She is forced to do this...AND I DIDN'T CARE. Maybe I'm a monster? But midway through the book and I was begging for a siren to sing to me just so I didn't have to suffer through the torture of reading this.
Reason #3: The actual, stupid, ridiculous, dumb insta love.
Why would you do this? WHY?
Why. Would. You. Write. This. Crap. Not to mention, it was a rewrite of a book she already published. Now, listen. I do believe in love at first sight, but only if it's written right. And in this book, it was like two cardboard boxes got together and were happy being boring bores together. BORING.
There was no development in their relationship. No nothing. At least if it was love at first sight, let their relationship build or something.
Reason #4: The actual writing itself makes it difficult to read.
It's all just, "blah, blah, blah, boring, blah, blah, blah." Like a twelve-year-old girl was like, "oh my gosh, this is the best romance I've ever written!"
Nooooooooooooooo.
Reason #5: It was a butt shit The Little Mermaid retelling.
Classic instantly ruined. It's nothing like that, so don't even bother with this book. I'd recommend watching milk curdle instead. And overall, it ranks as a 1 star book for me.
LLAP, booknerdians, I've gotta go finish The Star-Touched Queen, which will rave on positive reviews.
Lots of 💙 and 🍵,
Liz
Stuff I've used:
Yes, this book actually sucks: https://68.media.tumblr.com/0b74c1c2c1d39e82137bb878ee945a26/tumblr_inline_olqp58mc6n1qbhmtm_500.gif
It sucks a lot: https://media.giphy.com/media/mHjBdBZuqBvJC/giphy.gif
I'm dying of boredom: https://media.tenor.com/images/542cae9589ee52428d5057021cc5af64/tenor.gif
Tell me why: https://cloud.lovinmalta.com/images/uploads/2016/08/_blogWide/tell-me.gif?mtime=20160907151555
Your story sucks: http://retribution.fm/r/190/images/image15.gif
I almost gagged: https://media.giphy.com/media/kEuehzXptELHG/giphy.gif
I can't do this anymore: https://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/degrassi/images/b/b3/Snape-walks-away.gif/revision/latest?cb=20121023213158
But first, what's the book about?
The book follows a siren (mermaid) named Kahlen who is all doom and gloom until she meets a boy. And that's it. THAT'S. IT.
Are you relishing in the disappointment? Yeh, me too.
Reason #1: Dry, dull, cardboard cutout, paper, leaf-blowing-in-the-wind characters.
I'll be real. I'm easily bored, so maybe it's just me. But no, this was stupid, and so were the characters. I'd watch my milk curdle rather than suffer through these characters again. And I'm lactose intolerant.
Reason #2: A boring ass plot, riddled with boring ass "twists".
I mean, the girl kills people for a living with her singing voice, and I didn't care. She is forced to do this...AND I DIDN'T CARE. Maybe I'm a monster? But midway through the book and I was begging for a siren to sing to me just so I didn't have to suffer through the torture of reading this.
Reason #3: The actual, stupid, ridiculous, dumb insta love.
Why would you do this? WHY?
Why. Would. You. Write. This. Crap. Not to mention, it was a rewrite of a book she already published. Now, listen. I do believe in love at first sight, but only if it's written right. And in this book, it was like two cardboard boxes got together and were happy being boring bores together. BORING.
There was no development in their relationship. No nothing. At least if it was love at first sight, let their relationship build or something.
Reason #4: The actual writing itself makes it difficult to read.
It's all just, "blah, blah, blah, boring, blah, blah, blah." Like a twelve-year-old girl was like, "oh my gosh, this is the best romance I've ever written!"
Nooooooooooooooo.
Reason #5: It was a butt shit The Little Mermaid retelling.
Classic instantly ruined. It's nothing like that, so don't even bother with this book. I'd recommend watching milk curdle instead. And overall, it ranks as a 1 star book for me.
LLAP, booknerdians, I've gotta go finish The Star-Touched Queen, which will rave on positive reviews.
Lots of 💙 and 🍵,
Liz
Stuff I've used:
Yes, this book actually sucks: https://68.media.tumblr.com/0b74c1c2c1d39e82137bb878ee945a26/tumblr_inline_olqp58mc6n1qbhmtm_500.gif
It sucks a lot: https://media.giphy.com/media/mHjBdBZuqBvJC/giphy.gif
I'm dying of boredom: https://media.tenor.com/images/542cae9589ee52428d5057021cc5af64/tenor.gif
Tell me why: https://cloud.lovinmalta.com/images/uploads/2016/08/_blogWide/tell-me.gif?mtime=20160907151555
Your story sucks: http://retribution.fm/r/190/images/image15.gif
I almost gagged: https://media.giphy.com/media/kEuehzXptELHG/giphy.gif
I can't do this anymore: https://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/degrassi/images/b/b3/Snape-walks-away.gif/revision/latest?cb=20121023213158
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