5 Things Readers HATE
I have a dark soul.
Well, now that I've got that out...
Hey, how's it going?
Pretty good, actually. Thanks for asking. Yes. I did just answer myself. Shove off.
On the brighter side of the moon, I've got a list of 5 Things Readers Hate for you today. Whoever you are. Maybe these are just things that I hate. WHO. KNOWS. Yup, they are.
1. When your book or series doesn't have a fandom
Yes. This does actually happen. There are some books or series in the Universe that don't have a fandom. This is the actual truth, nerdy readers. Mostly, without a fandom it's just like this:
It's a freaking lonely road. You read a book. You love the book. You go online. But. There. Are. NO. FANDOMS. I felt a part of my soul die right now. Stupid horcrux. Better luck next time.
But really. You're alone with your thoughts and feelings and dkfjljdjkjjdfkfdjghkfhgfkj. Pain. A lot of pain. There's no one shipping your ships. There's no one to discuss shitty characters with or plot twists or villains or good guys or other things OR ANYTHING. I am passionate about this because I was a victim of this. And. It. Hurts.
Well. I'll go die now.
2. Spoilers
I'm looking at you, twitter jerk(s).
So, a book that was just released on said day, and you read it on said day and you spoil it online on said day. Do you have a life? Nope. Thought I'd answer that for you, just to make things a little easier. Sometimes, I wish I could scream at these people.
For obviously ruining my life.
😭
But really. Stop spoiling shit. Okay?
3. When writers kill off my fave character
No, that wasn't a mistake. I did say my fave character. You authors know who you are. You sit in your coffee shops, offices, and wherever, and just look like this:
My heart still hurts 'til this day. Just don't kill them, okay? Readers have enough crap to deal with. 😥
4. When you say you read it but you didn't
We hate you. With your smug face. Oh, so you googled the plot twists? You totally read it. We can sniff that shit out from miles away. Don't even try it.
5. Second books that suck
Don't even stretch that shit to a trilogy. But you'll do it anyways you bastards, you.
And we readers will feel like we are being drug through a pile of crap. A. Pile. Of. Crap. You'll ruin everything we loved about the first book and then laugh about it. Well, we aren't laughing, jerk.
Well, that's the last of it, reader friends. Get some rest and don't die inside like me.
I hear the mother ship calling for me...✌
Lots of 💙 and 🍵,
Liz
In case you're annoying like me:
Evil writers gif: https://media.giphy.com/media/A7rTdPxXP9fqM/giphy.gif
Willy Wonka being himself (😐): https://media.giphy.com/media/wMNK4IfeH86uQ/giphy.gif
Baby HP being an ass: https://media.giphy.com/media/BOkaZqEOnlAg8/giphy.gif
Stitch making be cry inside: http://imgur.com/XOn3Clj
Jack Sparrow (😍): https://media.tenor.com/images/0bd9c321d9cabe4dede79a0ef8a300ca/tenor.gif
Poor Leo: http://media0.giphy.com/media/3h2cExkZ1OT3a/giphy.gif
Well, now that I've got that out...
Hey, how's it going?
Pretty good, actually. Thanks for asking. Yes. I did just answer myself. Shove off.
On the brighter side of the moon, I've got a list of 5 Things Readers Hate for you today. Whoever you are. Maybe these are just things that I hate. WHO. KNOWS. Yup, they are.
1. When your book or series doesn't have a fandom
Yes. This does actually happen. There are some books or series in the Universe that don't have a fandom. This is the actual truth, nerdy readers. Mostly, without a fandom it's just like this:
It's a freaking lonely road. You read a book. You love the book. You go online. But. There. Are. NO. FANDOMS. I felt a part of my soul die right now. Stupid horcrux. Better luck next time.
But really. You're alone with your thoughts and feelings and dkfjljdjkjjdfkfdjghkfhgfkj. Pain. A lot of pain. There's no one shipping your ships. There's no one to discuss shitty characters with or plot twists or villains or good guys or other things OR ANYTHING. I am passionate about this because I was a victim of this. And. It. Hurts.
Well. I'll go die now.
2. Spoilers
I'm looking at you, twitter jerk(s).
So, a book that was just released on said day, and you read it on said day and you spoil it online on said day. Do you have a life? Nope. Thought I'd answer that for you, just to make things a little easier. Sometimes, I wish I could scream at these people.
For obviously ruining my life.
😭
But really. Stop spoiling shit. Okay?
3. When writers kill off my fave character
No, that wasn't a mistake. I did say my fave character. You authors know who you are. You sit in your coffee shops, offices, and wherever, and just look like this:
My heart still hurts 'til this day. Just don't kill them, okay? Readers have enough crap to deal with. 😥
4. When you say you read it but you didn't
We hate you. With your smug face. Oh, so you googled the plot twists? You totally read it. We can sniff that shit out from miles away. Don't even try it.
5. Second books that suck
Don't even stretch that shit to a trilogy. But you'll do it anyways you bastards, you.
And we readers will feel like we are being drug through a pile of crap. A. Pile. Of. Crap. You'll ruin everything we loved about the first book and then laugh about it. Well, we aren't laughing, jerk.
Well, that's the last of it, reader friends. Get some rest and don't die inside like me.
I hear the mother ship calling for me...✌
Lots of 💙 and 🍵,
Liz
In case you're annoying like me:
Evil writers gif: https://media.giphy.com/media/A7rTdPxXP9fqM/giphy.gif
Willy Wonka being himself (😐): https://media.giphy.com/media/wMNK4IfeH86uQ/giphy.gif
Baby HP being an ass: https://media.giphy.com/media/BOkaZqEOnlAg8/giphy.gif
Stitch making be cry inside: http://imgur.com/XOn3Clj
Jack Sparrow (😍): https://media.tenor.com/images/0bd9c321d9cabe4dede79a0ef8a300ca/tenor.gif
Poor Leo: http://media0.giphy.com/media/3h2cExkZ1OT3a/giphy.gif
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